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One night in Cancun with Teddie

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Apologies to Murray Head whose work I've just parodied. It's not you, it's Ted Cruz's poodle's fault.

One night in Cancun makes the cold Man warmer... Ted Cruz Ted Cruz

Cancun, Méxican setting
And the city don't know that the city is getting
The creme de la creme of the Tea Party world 
In a show with everything but Roger Stone

Time flies doesn't seem a minute
Since the Ritz-Carlton had his daughters in it
All change, don't you know that when you
Play at this level there's no ordinary venue

It's Bermuda or Brazil or the Bahamas or
Or this place!

One night in Cancun and the world's your dacquis
The bars are temples but the rum ain't free
You'll find a Corona in every golden beach bar
And if you're lucky then the Corona’s free
I can feel a virus sliding up to me

One town's very like another
When your head's down over your choices, brother

It's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity
To be looking at Fox news, not looking at the city

Whaddya mean?
Ya seen one gentrified, plastic, enclave town

Chocolate caliente méxicano, warm, and sweet
Some are set up in the Club Med Cancun suite

Go into Quarantined?! You're talking to a (white) tourist
Whose every move's among the purest
I get my kicks from Proud Boys, sunshine

One night in Cancun makes a lyin’ man humble
Not much between heat and ecstasy
One night in Cancun and the tough guys tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

Quintana Roo's gonna be the witness
To the ultimate test of political fitness
This grips me more than would a
Tikal Pyramid or Mayan Effigy

And thank God I'm only enjoying the heat, climate controlling it

I don't see you guys rating
The kind of presser I'm contemplating
I'd let you watch, I would invite you
But the twitter posts would not excite you

So you better go back to your freezing bars, your mega church
Your gun ranges

One night in Cancun and the world's your dacquis
The bars are temples but the rum ain't free
You'll find a Corona in every golden cloister

A little flesh, a little history
I can feel the virus  sliding up to me

One night in Cancun makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Cancun and the tough guys tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel the virus infesting me Ted Cruz Ted Cruz


Jack O'Kent is a staff writer at Public Intellectuals and the co-host of its podcast, PI Radio

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